Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Story time! From that time I was arrested at Universal Studios.

Back about ten years ago when I worked in LA  my buddy Dan and I had season passes to Universal Studios, so we would go almost twice a week. We’d get off work early, go to the park, get a few beers and ride a few rides.

One day after riding the Tour Tram, we got off and talked with the Tour guide for a bit. He was a cool guy and the conversation went on for about an hour.

After the conversation was over we went to the new “Mummy Maze.” As soon as we walked out of the Maze we were ambushed by a bunch of security guards yelling at us.
 They handcuffed us with those white ties and made us sit on the ground in front of the Maze while they yelled at us. Saying that we jumped off the Tram Tour and were running around backstage getting into trouble.We tried to tell them that was impossible, to ask the Tram Tour guide, that he would vouch for us, but they wouldn't listen.

Now before I continue… a quick note. People who know me, you know what I look like.
But Dan is a “Jack Black”-like guy with a big black leather jacket with patches, chains, and an anarchy symbol on the back. Also Dan had a mo-hawk… not a faux-Hawk, but a for real big Mohawk. That was spiky and green.

So after about an hour of yelling at us in front of people in line and the crowd walking by the security guards took us to a little interrogation room at Universal Studios.

This wasn’t mine and Dan’s first time in a interrogation room that year but whenever I get into trouble I start to laugh, so here I was laughing my ass off, which wasn’t making the situation any better. I must have looked like a psycho laughing as I was taken handcuffed through the park.

So Dan and I are sitting in this little interrogation room, still hand cuffed, waiting to find out what the hell is going on and this older woman walks in and starts to tell us:

OLDER LADY: "Two Latino men matching your description were seen jumping off the Tram Tour and running around backstage."

I repeat... “Two Latino men matching your description…”

I looked this lady dead in the eyes and said…

“Ma’am, do I look Latino to you? Clearly I’m a black man.”

Awkward Silence, and then it’s like she looked at us for the first time and said “You’re free to go.”

JOSH: “NO way. You’re not getting off that easy. You embarrassed us in front of lines of people. Traumatized us. TRAUMATIZED, Lady. We don’t just walk away.”

OLDER LADY “What do you want?”
JOSH: “I want free parking… and I never want to have to wait in line for a ride ever again.”

The older lady left the room and came back a few minutes later with a little laminated pass.

She said “One year” and let us go. The little pass said we were VIPs and didn’t have to wait in line, but it expired in a year.

Dan and I left the park with smiles on our faces. We came back the next day and rode the Jurassic Par ride FIVE times in a row just because we could.

This went on for about a year. True story. :)


mattcrap said...

great story

Joshua Williamson said...

Thanks, Matt!!

It was a funny time. :)